Sure Fire Ways To Get Your Resume Trashed

Update! There’s more:
7. Address your cover sheet to a different company.
6. Use the term “out of the box” in any fashion whatsoever.

5. Use the typeface Sand.
4. Use the typeface Sand with a bevel, emboss, colored drop shadow AND atleast three lens flares.
3. Include incoherent sentences, e.g., “I am a fast study.” in your cover sheet.
2. End your cover sheet with, “Please give me a chance.” This makes you look, to both employers AND women, completely pathetic.
1. Spell your OWN name incorrectly.

3 Comments // Comment or Ping

  1. I’m still trying to figure out how to get a rotating flaming guitar animated gif on my resume.

  2. I might know some people who could help with that…

  3. Sadly, I think my resume may have been this outdated/pathetic when I just went to update it and start looking for new jobs.

    Ok, not THIS pathetic!

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